Why is love so addicting
How to tell if you are addicted to love
To be in love is strange. Great too. Strange? In any case. Confusion is almost always inevitable, especially in the honeymoon phase. The thought of having someone by your side who will put butterflies in your stomach and keep you grinning a little is a wonderful one for most. However, is it possible to get so bogged down on this thought that one finds the idea of it all more attractive than the actual relationship or even the person it is about? Is It Possible To Be Addicted To Love?
In fact, it is the same with love addiction as with sex addiction: love addiction is a real, documented phenomenon. Although - like nymphomania - it is difficult to put into words and specifically diagnose, it can help to take a closer look at the definition of addiction. Caritas writes about this: "Dependency means that one can no longer live without the addictive substance (alcohol, drugs, medication) or that one feels an obsessive urge to exercise a certain behavior."
At a time when “love” is only a supposed swipe away, it does not seem too far-fetched against this backdrop that there may be people who develop an addiction and have an “compulsive urge” for the feelings they are having go hand in hand with a fresh fall in love and are simply registered by our brain as a reward. In combination with the still prevailing gender roles and the associated expectations, especially of women, it is not surprising that so many - here too: especially women - develop an unhealthy relationship with the great concept of love.
How do I know if I'm addicted to love?
So how do you know if you're addicted to love too? With regard to your romantic relationships, is your behavior already well on the way to becoming pathological? Well, not an easy question, because as I said: The diagnosis is anything but easy, because the symptoms could be many: The widespread tendency towards serial monogamy, i.e. the habitus of transitioning from one monogamous relationship to the next relatively seamlessly, is one of these factors . Again and again people who have an addictive urge for love or romantic relationships find themselves in unsatisfactory to toxic or even violent relationships. Or relationships that are peppered with unhealthily intense and regular ups and downs. They stay because they cannot tear themselves away - similar to a withdrawal attempt. All of this in turn has a negative effect on the self-worth of a "love-addicted" person and thus stimulates the need for confirmation through being in love again. And so begins a vicious circle - which, by the way, goes far beyond the basic human need to be loved.
Does that all sound very familiar? If you want, you can take a test at Love Addicts Anonymous (in English) to find out whether you or your behavior is already suspicious.
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